The Shakti School

Feminine Form Sacred Technology

Blog

10 Books to Read When You’re Feeling Lousy

10 Books to Read When Feeling Lousy

We all go through periods of ups and downs. It can be really difficult at times to pull your spirit up when it feel as if you're being challenged or tested from all directions. Reading is the perfect way to take a break from the negative mental spirals that could be swirling around in your head. It can be so helpful to take pause and read something uplifting, inspiring, or comical to nudge you back into the right direction of positive thinking and give you perspective.

Here are a few of our favorite uplifting reads.

For more of our favorites books, visit the Books We Love section of the blog.

Continue Reading

Tips for Sanity

Tips for sanity blog banner

We have shifted into a new way of living.

Being forced with no other choice than to embrace the uncertainty of each day, it’s not always easy to feel motivated or excited about staying at home and keeping “distance”. That’s why it’s helpful to call up your best friend, your mom, or your neighbor to share tips on how to keep feeling inspired and spread positivity. That’s why our team is sharing our current and favorite mood boosting tips. Here are just a few insights to what we’re listening to, what self-care we're loving, and what we’re snacking on.

Katie Online

Katie Silcox
Our Founder & C.E.O.

What music are you listening to? A lot of Beach House and electronic dance music....just gotta move! You can follow me on Spotify @Katie Rebecca Silcox

What’s your favorite podcast episode? The recent This American Life blew my mind - it's called "The Test"

What are you eating? Lots of salmon, smoothies, broths, sweet potatoes, salads with a ton of oil and vinegar, and chips and hummus 🙂

What is your go to product right now? The Wellness Formula

What has been the most helpful for keeping your sanity? Having my sweet friend in town from France. We kept each other strong and sane within the chaos. Also, laying outdoors, gardening, trying to walk everyday and Body Yantra!

Amaury Roseline

Amaury Vaillant
Our C.O.O.

What music are you listening to? Bachata and salsa to keep me moving and upbeat during the day. Joan Shelly's Like the River Loves the Sea in the morning and acoustics in the evenings. Spotify @Amaury Roseline

What’s your favorite podcast episode? Hard to choose! But I really liked Dr. Zach Bush's interview on Rich Roll's podcast from March 26

What are you eating? Lot's of Kitchari and bitter greens

What is your go to product right now? Goddess Ghee's The Hempress in my tea and a massage ball for my neck and shoulders. 

What has been the most helpful for keeping your sanity? Not reading the news and sticking to non-sensational reporting like NPR when I do check the news.

Sarah Waldron

Sarah Waldron
Our Operations, Membership & Event Coordinator

What music are you listening to? I have been listening to a lot of soothing music at night or during work hours: Sigur Ros and Slenderbodies. When I need uplifting or something to dance along to: Trevor Hall, The Revivalists, and the Classic Rock station on Spotify have been my go-tos the past month!

What's your favorite podcast episode? From The Ghee Spot I love We All Need Self-Love Training Wheels along with Haters Gonna Hate. I also love Unladylike for it's random, yet relatable and important topics. It addresses issues and patterns that I've never heard anyone address on a public platform before and brings in a bit of humor as well.

What are you eating? Roasted Garlic Lentil Soup!!  I am making big batches of soup with fresh and grounding ingredients. My favorite so far is my usual homemade lentil soup, but with a bunch of roasted garlic pureed and mixed in. I am also sipping on a tea of lemon, ginger, and tumeric root all day long.

What is your go to product right now? I am loving Life & Pursuits organic body massage oil after my shower. It's so nourishing and absorbs pretty quickly. I've also been taking Pior Living's Chyawanprash every morning with my lemon water to help boost immunity and ojas.

What has been the most helpful for keeping your sanity? Nature!  Getting outside daily for walks with my dog and pausing a lot to take in the subtleties around me. Hunting for morel mushrooms or other spring offerings in the woods is helping me keep my spirits high and bring beauty into each day.  The fresh air feels great after lots of time in the house.

Mary Silcox

Mary Silcox
Our Head of Creative Content & Communications

What music are you listening to? Alicia Keys, Wanda De Sah, and Mandolin Orange.

What’s your favorite podcast episode? Oprah’s Super Soul- Episode with Shawn Anchor (Part 1 & 2) on The Secrets of Happy People and The Life Altering Power of a Positive Mind. So uplifting!!!

What are you eating? Tons of vegetables spiced with turmeric, cumin, & garlic, leafy greens cooked with backyard dandelions, a little bit of fish, blueberries, and roasted carrots dipped in almond butter. 

What is your go to product right now? Foria’s CBD intimacy lube (gotta keep it interesting), Banyans Breast care balm, and magnesium calm. 

What has been the most helpful for keeping your sanity? Facetime hangs with my sister & my mom, SUNSHINE, and my man.

Continue Reading

Ayurveda in the Spring (antiviral tips included)

Ayurveda in the Spring

The beginning of spring is such a magical time of the year. For many of us there is a feeling of relief having survived another winter when there is less sunshine and blue sky to keep our moods elevated. During this time, most of us are overjoyed with the sight of the newly forming buds, the daffodils poking their heads out, and the return of all the chirping birds.

In Ayurveda this is the time when the water and earth elements are most present. When water and earth come together it can make for some pretty beautiful happenings: the growth of new seedlings, flowers bloom, trees grow and reproduce, ice melts, and rivers flow freely. However, when water and earth combine it also forms mud! This mud, or kaphic overload, can take up space in our physical bodies which can cause some imbalances like lethargy, allergies, congestion, and more mucus. And what’s worse: it's often when we're feeling out of balance that we tend to reach for the things that will further take us out of balance such as overeating, laziness, overconsuming sugar or alcohol, or going down a social media spiral. Here are some things you can do to avoid getting stuck in the mud AND that will be extremely helpful for boosting your immunity.

Practices to Pacify Kapha

  • Wake early
  • Dry Brush
  • Exercise first thing in the morning: take a brisk walk, do some jumping jacks, or go on a short run
  • Keep warm
  • Get an invigorating massage
  • Add stimulating music to your playlist
  • Go out dancing!
  • Laugh and spend time with loved ones

Foods Tips to Pacify Kapha

  • Add foods that are pungent, astringent, and bitter: aloe, nettle, dandelion, quinoa & barley, turmeric, mung beans, mustard greens, lemon, spiced broths
  • Add apple cider vinegar to your foods
  • Consume less meat
  • Avoid dairy
  • Add activating spices like cayenne, ginger, black pepper, and mustard

Herbs & Supplements to Support Immunity, Viral Infections & Decrease Kapha

Herbal Nature Study

It’s important to take care of your health at all times, but especially during flu season and other viral epidemics. These foods, supplements, and practices will help to boost your immunity and to ward off viral disease.

Continue Reading

Finding Light and Hope During Global Crisis

Finding Light and Hope During Global Crisis

“We make things and seed them into the world, never fully knowing — often never knowing at all — whom they will reach and how they will blossom in other hearts, how their meaning will unfold in contexts we never imagined.” PICO IYER

It is no secret that we are currently living through a global crisis.

It's truly heartbreaking how many people will be affected by the Coronavirus pandemic in a way that will be life altering forever. And, many others that are suffering in ways that will affect their livelihood in the months to follow. Throughout all the terrifying uncertainty, the one thing that is certain is that we are all united in our shared experience. In times when we are experiencing grief, pain, loss, or uncertainty, it can be difficult to fall back on the practices, routines, or rituals that we know serve us best on our hardest of days. This is the time to really study the teachings on impermanence, non-attachment, and on what is most essential to your spiritual well-being.

While we don’t want to neglect the importance of educating ourselves on the devastating statistical facts that this virus has and will have, we also know that there are millions of news broadcasts doing that very well. So, as much as possible we want to share with our community all of the GOOD that is still happening at this time, all of the positive news and togetherness that has already come of this crisis, and all of the resources we have for inspiration and motivation to help get us through these troubling times.

There isn’t much that is certain living in the middle of a pandemic, but what is certain is that we have to move forward. And, if we choose to take this one day at a time, we can choose the intention of how we approach each day. I urge you not to stop seeking out joy. We can't stop noticing the flowers are in bloom, we can’t stop noticing the sun rising and setting, and we can't stop counting our blessings.

Self-isolation has shaken the masses to look at what is essential to survival. All throughout social media I see people spending time in solitude under nature's backdrop, I see families making homemade meals together, I see friends laughing through zoom chats, virtual happy hours, and viral meditations.

I also see people taking control of their health. I see people planting seeds, building garden beds, organizing their homes, and learning how to live with less.

And yes, while we still must be vigilant about what we can do to overcome this and stay real about what is happening, let's not forget life still has the ability to be GOOD. And, we can learn from this.

We know you’re spending a little more time inside, so here are a few articles we have found that highlight ways in which people have turned their Coronavirus situations into a vehicle of hope and love. We hope that they are uplifting and inspirational for you during these days when things feel so heavy and hopeless.

Virtual Happy hour Concerts: LIVE concerts in Richmond, Virginia from one living room to another. I’ve been seeing these pop up all over the globe. Artists sharing their gifts in the time of crisis. https://richmondgrid.com/virtual-happy-hour-house-show-series/

Italians in Quarantine & Still Singing from their balconies:  Still finding joy, raising their spirits, and uplifting the global energetic vibration. https://www.clickorlando.com/news/local/2020/03/16/coronavirus-italians-keep-spirits-up-by-singing-from-balconies-during-lockdown/

Jimmy Fallon Home Shows: Not only is Jimmy Fallow broadcasting from home to help generate some laughs (videoed by his wife), but he has already created a donation platform to help those in need during the current pandemic. https://www.wzpl.com/2020/03/18/jimmy-fallon-does-the-tonight-show-from-home/

#VIRALKINDNESS: Becky Wass, from the county of Cornwall in the U.K., created a postcard stating, “Hello! If you are self-isolating, I can help.” With space for people to fill out their contact details and whether they would like help with shopping, posting mail, or simply a phone call. This act of kindness went viral and caused others to do the same. One woman posted, “Let’s spread kindness instead of viruses, because kindness is contagious too.” https://www.cnbc.com/2020/03/16/coronavirus-compassion-the-kindness-postcard-and-other-heartwarming-gestures.html

The Front Porch Photography Series: Throughout history creatives have used times of struggle and despair to propel them into projects that seek to spread light and hope to their surrounding communities and beyond. The Front Porch project is not only raising funds for photographers and other freelancers affected by the pandemic, it's bringing communities outside and together in our temporary physical separation:

The Sofa Singers: "The Sofa Singers is a free & weekly online singing event that aims to bring people together from around the world to spark joy and human connection. Set up by vocal leader James Sills as a response to global self isolation during the Coronavirus outbreak, The Sofa Singers bring together hundreds of people in real time for 45 minutes of simultaneous singing, learning a classic song with some optional harmonies/backing parts.” https://www.thesofasingers.net/

Coronavirus leads to huge drop in air pollution: This could be mother nature’s way of telling us all to slow down and respect the earth in ways that we haven’t been practicing up until this point. Perhaps the decline in air pollution will be a motivator for the world to shift into a more sustainable and responsible life. https://www.positive.news/environment/coronavirus-pandemic-leads-to-huge-drop-in-air-pollution/

Reduction in emissions in China could save as many as 77,000 lives:A Researcher from Stanford University has calculated that the reduction in emissions in China during the Coronavirus could save as many as 77,000 lives. If that number is put into context, that's more than 20 times the number of people who died from Coronavirus during that time. http://www.g-feed.com/2020/03/covid-19-reduces-economic-activity.html

Woman doing grocery runs for the elderly: In all parts of the world where people are struggling the most, many people are taking action by being a superior neighbor. People are reaching out to those around them that are in isolation, are elderly and unable to shop for groceries. https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/grocery-runs-for-seniors-during-coronavirus/

A new light on the internet causing more connection: Forced video chatting during a period of global anxiety could improve our quality of communication leading to more frequent and more meaningful conversations. https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2020/03/social-distancing-coronavirus-videochat-facetime/608038/

Couple Married on the Streets of New York City during the Coronavirus outbreak: This couple didn’t let the outbreak stop them wanting to make their commitment to each other public. With their friend officiating from his 4th story apartment, they were married on the streets of NYC. https://www.today.com/news/good-news

Nurture

One of the most important things we can be doing at this time is to take care of one another, keep moving, keep finding sources of JOY and ways to inspire ourselves and our neighbors. This may be the universe giving us a little extra time to use as an opportunity to straighten out our own soul and to ask ourselves questions about how we can live optimally; Are we finding daily connection to nature? Are we expressing gratitude towards the people we love? Are we taking care of our neighbors? The planet? How can we live more sustainably? What does our body need in order to be more creative and live our most inspired life? How can I help someone today?

More Interesting Links on Living with Positivity Through Coronavirus & Resources for Inspiration:

Interesting Interpretation on What’s Happening Astrologically 

Wim Hof's Advice on CoronaVirus

GoodNewsNetwork

Brainpickings

On Being

The Shakti School Blog

The Happiness Project

ZenHabits

TinyBuddha

Charles Eisenstein's essay The Coronation

Our Love in the Time of Covid podcast episode

 

Ted Talks and Other Videos:

Elizabeth Gilbert

Brene Brown - The Power of Vulnerability

Shawn Achor - The Happy Secret to Better Work

The Surprising Science of Happiness

What Makes a Good Life

Jim Carey on Awakening

Oprah Winfrey talks with Thich Nhat Hanh

Woman Blowing Dusts on Her Hand
Continue Reading

A love note from Katie — Staying Healthy and Calm in Chaotic Times

March 16, 2020

Oh man. They say this era is the Kali Yuga — the time of great tribulation and great LEARNING. When times are seemingly at their darkest, there is the greatest potential, the teachings say, for LIGHT to come through.

I just wanted to connect personally with the community here at Shakti School to say that truly there is no better time to become even more seated in the inherent GOODNESS of our being than now. How can we love ourselves and others more authentically and fully. Times like these remind us of how SACRED all of life is. We never know what tomorrow holds.

Here’s a small insight into my thoughts around facing the massive health scare we are all privy to on a global scale, and what I am trying to keep in my own practice right now.

  1. It's normal to be afraid. Try not to beat yourself up over feeing it. But try not to dwell there. In all traditions we practice the strategic use of our attention. Stay informed, but don’t run to the news every hour. When things feel chaotic it's a good time to find the center of you that is calm and unchanging. Practice returning there.
  2. Follow the instructions from our medical and CDC community. By this point, you are all well aware of social distancing, quarantine and hand washing. Perhaps our global community can benefit from some unintentional hibernation and the simplicity of “no events” on the horizon.
  3. Practice gratitude — it is what keeps our cellular matrix (and immunity) in good communication.
  4. Do all the things — so many of you KNOW how to care for your immunity. Choose the foods that you know boost your body. Avoid junk, sugar and fried things. Dry brush. Exercise. Sleep. Take baths.
  5. Neti pot neti pot neti pot.
  6. Oils to the ears and nose.
  7. Herbs that I’m leaning into during this time: echinacea, turmeric, tulsi* and my go-to for feeling yuck is Wellness Formula (which is incredible and full of all the good anti-virals and vitamins).
  8. Zinc. An abundance of evidence has shown the antiviral activity of zinc against a variety of viruses.
  9. Reishi and Astragalus. Both very well-known adaptogens and immune-protection.
  10. Fresh air
  11. Lay on the EARTH as much as possible
  12. Laugh — we are watching old episodes of RuPaul's Drag Race.
  13. Marvel at the incredible way in which our entire global community is truly united against this thing. I’ve heard reports of Chinese doctors going to Italy to help out. That’s some SAINTLY stuff right there. What about Italians coming out on their balconies in Rome to collectively sing the national anthem? Read this to feel instant heart upliftment.
  14. Listen to our podcast with Mary Thompson
  15. Practice self-regulation (join the Shakti School Subscription for meditations that do just that!) And practice co-regulation (speaking with others who can love and support you). We all need reminded that most likely things are gonna’ be okay. It is highly likely that we will survive this. And even if things get worse, we are loved and protected by our Creator.
With love and prayers that we all remain healthy,
Katie
*Use my discount code KATIES15 for 15% off at Banyan Botanicals
Continue Reading

2020 Ayurveda School Scholarship Recipients

Scholarship-Winners

We are happy to announce the following 2020 Ayurveda School scholarship winners. Thank you for all your soulful and love-filled participation. We deeply appreciate all of the honesty and effort poured into the submissions. Our team watched every single video sent and felt truly inspired by many!  Without further ado, below are some of the recipients of this year's 2020 winners and their testimonials.

 

Jamille Henry | San Antonio, Texas | @goddessjamm

"My name is Jamille and I am from San Antonio, Texas. As a scholarship recipient, I would really like to learn and reconnect with nature and use this knowledge to improve my own health and the health of my family. This also blends beautifully with my studies in nutrition. Doing Shakti school and working toward my degree at the same time, I am seeing how the Western and Ayurvedic sciences connect and it is incredible! I can’t wait to see what other ways I will be able to incorporate the knowledge I gain here."

 

Amanda Rezenda | New York, New York | @mujerlilith

“My name is Amanda Rezende and I'm from Caracas, Venezuela. Last year, I found the Shakti School scrolling down on my Instagram feed and immediately fell in love with Katie's message. Every time I saw an email from Katie talking about the Ayurveda School my heart beat fast as if it knew that I was prepared to receive that knowledge. I had no doubt, I needed to be part of this, so I applied for the scholarship program; as I recently launched my women-focused online content platform www.mujerlilith.com (soon to be launched in English) to offer holistic information that empowers women in Latin America, Spain and the rest of the world; and couldn't afford the course, due to all the expenses a project like this could result in. I'm on a mission to keep empowering women with the tools I learn and I definitely think being in this course will be an amazing add-on to the library of my life. A library that's in constant service of women around the world as I, undoubtedly, believe we women have a mission to elevate this world's vibration in the next centuries to come. Thank you Shakti School, Katie, Amaury and everyone who works on this beautiful initiative to bring Ayurveda to more women. May your message and knowledge be multiplied for thousands and thousands of generations.”

 

Marion Martin | Tucson, Arizona | @Solcozy

“I am a diverse explorer, a curious single parent & a passionate desert dweller here in Tucson, AZ. I was raised in South Georgia but have fallen in love with the desert mountains, the sunsets & sounds. I previously studied Hebrew/ Judeo-Christian texts while living in Israel. I am drawn to & inspired by the multifaceted layers of meaning and encouraged discussion surrounding Sanskrit and Ayurvedic philosophies. In 2014 I helped open a 300bed shelter for unaccompanied alien children in Tucson. This work triggered some traumas in me that I am still working to create sustainable healing from. In 2016 I became pregnant & searched out mainly DIY Ayurvedic learning but I also found Shakti school. This scholarship learning opportunity means so much to my own internal support, my ability to parent & hopefully share with my community to offer support. I hope to cultivate my passion for learning Ayurvedic life skills and healing mechanisms along with creating a healthy community & financial stability. I am stoked to learn along with this beautiful group of lovely humans this year.”

 

Madhu Prana | San Francisco, California | @prana_madhu

“I am Madhu, a visual designer, dancer, and yoga instructor. My early trysts with Ayurveda were during my grad-school days when I would look up Ayurvedic remedies to heal minor health issues. But it is in the last few years that my relationship with Ayurveda truly deepened. I ended up with a painful stomach infection and developed ulcers; it was a very hard time. Doctors put me on antibiotics and while the stomach infection went away, my stomach had become extremely sensitive to all kinds of foods. I could not enjoy a single meal without extreme pain for hours after eating. Around the same time, I had a sciatica nerve injury while dancing as well. That's when I decided to make it my own responsibility to self-heal and started reading more about Ayurveda. I slowly observed and understood my imbalances and made necessary changes to my diet, routine, and started to practice self-care. I was feeling very positive and my energy levels improved significantly. I’m extremely grateful for this ancient healing system that has the potential to transform lives. My vision is to share this knowledge in my own unique way to this world. I consider it a blessing to have found and to learn from a teacher like Katie who is so heartful and passionate about this healing system! I sincerely believe the world really needs love in the purest form which starts with us by loving ourselves and our community <3 Thank you Katie and Amaury for choosing me, I’m soul excited to receive this scholarship and look forward to a magical year with all the wonderful queens of Shakti school!!!”

 

Alisha Lettman | Vancouver, BC, Canada | @ital.womb

"As a heritage learner, having been gifted this program has been a great blessing. This opportunity to reconnect to such a powerful traditional knowledge system reverberates in my bones, activating a knowing that is bigger than my life. I am inspired to follow this wisdom by continuing on to learn Ayurvedic massage, and incorporate all I've learned in my future Midwifery practice."

 

Jane Daniels | Winston-Salem, North Carolina | @ncjane77

“Hello, my name is Jane Daniel and I’m mom of three bouncing boys, a holistic health coach, and a female that finally feels like herself at the ripe young age of 42. I was introduced to Ayurveda during my training as a health coach and became more interested in it as I dealt with my personal physical journey of cystic acne, extreme exhaustion, and serious Type A (aka imbalanced Pitta, LOL) tendencies. Through books that fell into my arms, podcasts, and my daily meditation practice that I started 5 years ago, I realized these physical issues were related to images, emotions, and feelings that I haven’t dealt with in my past. I deeply resonate with Ayurveda and want to use this knowledge in continuing to heal myself and intuitively help clients in their own journey of life in a more feminine, fluid way. I love Katie’s perspective and style of teaching Ayurveda and am humbled by the generosity of receiving this scholarship. Thank you for the opportunity and am thrilled to be a part of such an amazing group of women!”

 

Kelsey Jo Thompson | Twin Cities, Minnesota | @kelseyjothompson

“My name is Kelsey and I am one of the very blessed and honored recipients of the Shakti Scholarship — which, without — being a part of this community would not be possible!  I have committed my life to working with kids; teaching them tools to access their own super powers through imagination, playfulness, yoga, breath, connection, creativity, food, and joy!  My business is growing as a holistic learning + lifestyle specialist; while I also work part-time as a substitute teacher (preK-12), camp counselor, and yoga + barre instructor.  I am an archetypal Pisces who loves the water element and all things associated!  If you follow me on IG you will find me at the lake, on the farm, playing with llamas, cooking nourishing foods, or dancing on top of elevated surfaces. I plan to use my Ayurveda education to first heal my own imbalances, and to integrate a holistic health education in the schools by coaching teachers, students, and their families to take control of their own health, too.”

 

Arlene Salcedo | Temecula, California | @lunasoulwellness

“My name is Arlene Salcedo. I am a Latina who has lived in Southern California my entire life. I am a mother of four beautiful children and a wife to a wonderful husband. I am honored to receive this scholarship to attend Shakti School for the Ayurvedic Wellness Coach Program. Attending Ayurveda school has been a goal of mine for quite some time. I was first introduced to Ayurvedic philosophies during my 200-hour yoga certification training. It was during this time that I fell in love with the holistic approach to health and lifestyle. I am excited to become a certified Ayurvedic Wellness Coach. Upon graduating, I intend to lead Ayurvedic wellness retreats immediately and continue to introduce Ayurveda to my yoga students. I am committed to becoming a healing resource for my Latina community. In leading the practice of Ayurveda in my community, I hope to help facilitate the growth of the Ayurveda lifestyle for future generations. During my practice and growth, I hope to always create a safe and welcoming space for Latinas and other women of color. In the end, my dream is to open my wellness center, where ALL women will feel safe, comfortable, and excited to practice healthy living in the SAME space. I hope to empower all women to be their own healer.”

 

Continue Reading

What’s Love Got To Do With It

What's Love got to do with it_

Whether you are single or in partnership, we're all in a constant state of relating to one another. Maybe it’s your lover, your husband, or your girlfriend, but it’s also your mother, your best friend, and your neighbor. The list goes on. Inevitably, as any relationship deepens, our emotions become more vulnerable, our fears and personal stories get in the way, and it can become increasingly difficult to approach conflict with love and clear communication, which is what we all ultimately desire.

If we could only take a moment to pause and step back it’s possible that we could have more success when it comes to resolving issues with the ones we love most.

One of the most typical causes of arguments comes from the patterned thought process of seeing the other person as the answer, or source, to your happiness. This is more common in romantic partnerships. In American society we have been taught through pop culture that our partner should be “our everything.” It’s quite a burden to place on one another when in fact our deepest sense of happiness should come from within our own independent well of joy. If we are unable to find our own inner peace and ease, every relationship we are in will suffer because of it.

Many relationships suffer due to our lack of understanding around our own pain and suffering. When we're hyperfocused on our own pain it puts us in a defensive position where from we feel attacked. This can be extremely harmful to the relationship and will be a major obstacle to overcoming the initial or root issue. When you find yourself in an uncomfortable conversation and you are in defense mode, either an argument with a family member or a fight with your husband, try asking the following questions:

What's the story I'm telling myself?

Who am I in this conflict?

What is this conflict truly stemming from?

Do I need to be more independent around this issue?

Only after taking a step back (maybe even taking several days) and answering these questions are you ready to enter back into the conversation with your loved one. At this point you will be far more equipped to clearly communicate what it is that you truly feel and in a way that will be expressed with love rather than coming from baggage, anger, fear, or any other negative emotion.

The issue may always be there, but as we evolve how we deal with the issue, it's possible that the relationship may evolve as well, and the issue may dissolve because of that. Try to see arguments as opportunities for growth for you and your loved one to strengthen your connection, and to align more fully on certain values. It's also an opportunity to examine and tell the truth. It’s always helpful to place yourself in the other’s shoes. Try to understand where your loved one is coming from and put their needs before your own. When we operate from a place of love and presence it makes space for deeper appreciation and understanding. And, could even lead us to embrace the differences that got us into the quarrel in the first place.

Key Take-Aways:

Take a step back

Ask yourself the above questions on how you play a role in the conflict

Communicate how you feel from a place of love

Think less about solving the conflict and more about evolving it

While researching this topic, multiple women came up with the same answer when asked what was the one thing they felt would create more ease in their relationships:

“communicating our needs regularly and finding the balance between getting our own needs met and helping the other person get theirs"

I have a class all about Polarity and Relationship Dynamics, including a powerful 20-minute Body Yantra meditation for igniting your animal magnetism in The Shakti School Subscription, February 2018 issue.

February2018

Login here to access the classes or sign up for one month free using the discount code FREETRIAL at checkout.

And, if you’re looking for ways to spice up your relationship in the bedroom or to give yourself some extra love, check out our favorite CBD intimacy fluid from FORIA wellness. Make sure to use the coupon code SHAKTILOVE at checkout 🙂

Continue Reading

The Pelvic Floor & Pleasure

The Pelvic Floor & Pleasure

The pelvic floor was designed not to be a muscle you train, but rather a muscle that moves fluidly in connection with the muscles in your lower limbs and trunk of your body. The combination of these muscles working together in a feminine flow is what results in a healthy pelvic floor. Contrary to popular belief, repetitively engaging in kegel exercises (exercises that train the pelvis to contract) is not a balanced approach for strengthening the pelvic bowl, unless you are using them for postpartum recovery or targeting a certain injury or imbalance. Don’t get me wrong, kegel exercises do have their place in women’s health. Kegels and other tightening exercises (like using a jade egg: See p. 198 of Happy, Healthy, Sexy) can be extremely beneficial to mother’s after giving birth or any woman working to retrain, retone, and re-tighten the vaginal walls. Outside of that, when we exclusively focus on contracting the pelvic floor we become vulnerable to many health imbalances including chronic stress, bloating, hormonal issues, and possibly pelvic floor disorder. When our pelvic floor muscles are too tight it can dull our sensitivity to arousal and sexual pleasure. For a flower to open, it must surrender it’s petals. It all comes back to balance.

Did you know that there is a direct line of fascia linking your jaw to your pelvis?

The connection and bio-mechanical relationship that your jaw and pelvis have is particularly helpful for women to understand. It's especially relevant for women with pelvic floor pain. A study in the Journal of Manipulative and Physiological Therapeutics from Hanover Medical School in Germany revealed that TMJ (aka temporo-mandibular joint dysfunction) plays an important role in hip mobility restriction experienced by patients with pain. This indicated a connectedness between these two intrinsic parts of the body.

If you've been stuck in a pattern of clenching the pelvis it may be difficult to even know where to begin when it comes to relaxing those muscles. Going to the jawline can be a more accessible place to start and will seem to magically open the pelvic bowl. Ina May Gaskin, a female healer and wise leader in midwifery, even coined the term “the sphincter law” to explain that if the jaw and throat are relaxed then the buttocks and pelvis will be too. She says, “The state of relaxation of the mouth and jaw is directly correlated to the ability of the cervix, the vagina, and the anus to open to full capacity.” (Gaskin, 2003, p. 170) On the flip side, if you are clenching your jaw often, you’re probably also clenching your pelvis.

How do I know if my pelvis is contracted?

If you exercise frequently, do yoga, stress easily, or wear heels above 1/8th of an inch, your pelvis is probably contracted. In the modern day yoga and fitness world many women are cued to “contract the navel, lift your belly in and up, draw your navel in and pull your tailbone down,” and while these cues may have there place for certain exercises, if you aren’t spending adequate time intentionally doing the opposite and relaxing you are cuing your body to stay in a hyperarousal state. When we wear heels it causes an anterior pelvic tilt.

These incredible bodies we live in were made to keep each body part in balance with the other. If one body part becomes fixed, the whole system has to compensate. This can lead to a chain reaction of imbalance causing our abdominal organs to be squashed and our belly to bloat.

Many of us have lost our sensitivity to even feel this hyper-flexed state because we've become somewhat disconnected from our bodies. By engaging in more fluid, less structured movement, and through time spent softening, surrendering, and relaxing the pelvic floor those muscles will actually become stronger! Just like the rest of the body, when you overtax a certain muscle, you need adequate rest and recovery time in order for that muscle to actually grow and remain healthy.

How can we maintain an overall healthy pelvic floor?

Diversify your movements! Don’t just focus on one exercise. Doing kegels is similar to doing a bicep curl for your pelvis. You’re only going to strengthen one muscle. Try engaging in a wide range of fluid motions. Movements involving squatting, lunging, and lengthening of the limbs will help tone the pelvis while also help to strengthen the extremities which will create ease on the pelvis while also gaining strength and longevity.

Exercises to tone, relax, & strengthen the pelvis:

  • Breathing practices with elongated exhales
  • Long walks in shoes without heels
  • Take pause throughout the day to relax the jaw
  • Lay down with some massage balls!
  • Get or give yourself a face massage
  • Chakravakasana (cat cow) with lion’s breath to loosen the hips and the jaw
  • Anytime you are doing tightening or strengthening exercises make sure to take adequate recovery time and focus on relaxing the jaw & the pelvic bowl
  • Our Foam roller and pelvic release classes in the Shakti School Membership Community:
Pelvic Power Bowl
March2019
May2019

Login here to view these classes or sign up for one month free using the discount code FREETRIAL at checkout.

How will having a more relaxed & toned pelvis lead to experiencing more pleasure?

When the pelvic floor muscles are chronically tensed the muscles will eventually become less flexible. When the muscles are unable to move and stretch, sensations will become weakened and the ability to engage with that area emotionally will also become more difficult.

In Happy Healthy Sexy: Ayurveda Wisdom for Modern Women, I wrote: “Pleasure-power has everything to do with cultivating our ability to feel and experience pleasure in daily life-- in and out of the bedroom. It’s about getting quiet and content enough to experience the immense beauty that is always present when our senses are tuned in.” Similarly, when we educate ourselves on the pelvic floor it is essential for us to focus on being in continuous engagement with our bodies. The key element to building strength, fluidity, and our ability to experience pleasure is to return to movements that are less rigid, more balanced, and more fluid. It is there where we will find more ease with the body, mind, and spirit.

Our Favorite Products for Pelvic Floor Health

Foria Awaken Arousel Fluid and Personal Lubricant

We LOVE this product. It's main ingredients are Hemp (a source of CBD!) and Kava. It helps relax the pelvic floor and increase blood circulation to nourish your tissues and increase your capacity for pleasure. Get 10% off your order with the promocode SHAKTILOVE.

Jade Eggs Set

Banyan’s Coconut Brahmi Oil

Use promocode KATIES15 for 15% off your order with Banyan.

Foods that are good for your connective tissue:

References

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19539119

https://www.nutritiousmovement.com/kegel-queen/

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4573594/

https://www.alignpt.com/mysterious-connection-pelvis-jaw/

https://www.christinemathesonnd.com/blog/pelvic-health-jaw-tension-connection

Continue Reading