The Shakti School

Feminine Form Sacred Technology

spirituality

You Are So Much More Than You Know

Two big questions that most human beings will ponder at some point in their lives: “Who am I?” and “How can I get more of what I want in my life?”

Some of us may even ask ask them on a daily basis.

One of the things I love about the Tantric yoga tradition is its systematic approach to answering both of these inquiries. The Taittiriya Upanishad, one of the most important yogic scriptures, says that if we really want to know who we are, and get more joy and fulfillment in life, we gotta get to know our subtle anatomy.

Why? Because we are, according to Tantric anatomy, not one, but a composite of five bodies (pancha koshas): the physical body, the energetic body, the mental/emotional body, the inner-teacher or wisdom body, and the bliss body. When we can bring awareness into the deep layers of each of these bodies, we gain access to our highest, most evolved, powerful Self.

Body Mapping

Each of these bodies comes with their own limitations, access points, and super-powers. The more we know about each one of them, and the more familiar we get in their unique flavors, the more we have a relationship to them. And when we can relate them as as layers of who we are, the more they begin to show us their hidden contents.

The teachings go on to explain that what is hidden in these bodies is both our unconscious negative patterning, as well as our greatest gifts and powers. When the patterns that are hidden in the bodies emerge, we are no longer under the pull of the unconscious stuff. We can now get more of what we truly want as we bring the limitations and the latent capacities of the unconscious to the surface. In the end, when we penetrate the last layer of who we are, we are left with an endless power to create, act, and know.

Access Points

The physical. Many activities invite us into the physical body. Asana, for example, is an excellent way to tune in. We can feel our bones and they way they stack on top of each when we come into a Plank Pose. What happens to the tops of your thighs when you do Warrior 1 for long enough? Perhaps a burning sensation or a “shaking with joy.” Dancing will also bring you into the physical. So will a big meal, strong pain, sex, or a sunburn.

The energetic. Commonly referred to as the prana body, this can be felt when we keep the physical body still. We experience prana, according to the teachings, as subtle moving sensations like vibration and pulse, or we see it when we close our eyes as color or light. We can also experience prana as the impulse that pulls breath into the body (without us trying at all), and the force that causes air to leave again. This is one of the reasons the yogis encouraged such a strong connection to the breath. Prana also rides along the many intelligent processes in the body: the heart beat, the circulation of blood, and the capacity of our sensory organs.

The mental/emotional. This is where many of us spend a lot of time. It’s the part of us that thinks, plans, decides, emotes, and reacts. Its also the part of us that over-thinks, obsessively plans, sits in indecision, represses emotion instead of channeling it, and overreacts. Meditation is a wonderful way to access this body in a balanced and helpful way. Simply sitting and watching your thoughts, opinions, and judgements with a sense of detachment can give you more access to witnessing (and being less identified by the pulls of) this body.

The inner teacher.  This is also often called the Wisdom Body. We can think of it as the highest aspect of our intuition and conscience. It’s the part of you that urges you out of bed to meditate or go for a run when you’d much rather lounge in the sheets checking Facebook. It’s the part of us that always knows the right path to take. Just like we would lift weights to make the physical body strong, we strengthen this body by sitting in silence, and sharpening our ability to hear the voice of our soul. When this body is strong, our daily actions become giant steps forward in the direction of our highest life purpose, our calling, our big destiny. We move from a place of knowingness instead of reaction.

The bliss. It’s pretty amazing that the subtlest aspect of who we are, at the core of all the other bodies, is referred to as an ocean of unending waves of bliss. Ironically, we access this body by actually dis-identifying with everything. To practice being in your bliss body, you can try the Tantric practice of neti neti, a word meaning “not this, not that.” In a meditative seat, notice what arises in your field of awareness. A thought about your job pops up and you say/acknowledge, “I’m not that.” You feel your low back ache a little, same thing: “I’m not that.” You feel your desire for more intimate love, “I’m not that.” A hunger pang arises, “I’m not this.” You sense light in front of your forehead, “I’m not that.” You may even feel, for a split second, the bliss. And in that moment, remember,  “I’m not even that.” The more you keep surrendering into non-identification, the more, the teachings promise, the bliss can flow.

~Katie

This article was originally published on the Yoga Journal Blog on June 25, 2012.

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Sex and the Three Doshas

We are all a composite of all three doshas. There are times when you may feel like making love like a bunny (vata style) or lounging about like a tigress (kapha style). Remember, you have all of nature’s gifts at your disposal, so don’t put yourself in a sexual doshic box.

That said, we do have tendencies that we were born with, and those tendencies lead us toward behaviors, which in turn have their own doshic expressions. For example, vata is the part of our sexual expression that is mobile. When vata is balanced, we have freedom of movement, but also the ability to hold back our climax. When out of balance, climax can happen too fast and sex can leave us feeling depleted and breathless. Pitta is the part of our sexuality that relates to sexual vitality and vigor. It is the part of us that initiates sex and feels the burning passion for our lover. When out of balance, we may have no desire. Kapha sexuality is related to our sexual staying power, potency, and physical unctuousness. When in balance, our sex secretions are of good quantity and quality. Excess kapha can lead to sexual laziness and a heavy quality to lovemaking.

Sexual expression is all about expansiveness. Through the union of two beings, and orgasm, there is a potentiality to experience a state of consciousness very different from the consciousness you hold, say, in line at the post office or on the phone with your mother (thank God). Due to this potential for expansion, sex can be incredibly healing or incredibly destructive.

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Healthy, life-bringing, satisfying sex requires open channels. Think of the entire mind/body as a complex and interrelated system of physical and energetic tubes (srotas and nadis). Just as there are channels that move our blood, lymph, and waste products, there are also channels that move our sex

ual energy. In general, if we are blocked in any of the channels, our sexual energy can be blocked. This is why chronically constipated women commonly suffer from depressed libido and sleep disorders, in that both sleep and sex require a relaxing and an opening in the channels that govern letting go.

Similarly, if we are worried or unsatisfied, our sex channels get blocked. In this holistic framework, taking care of your digestion, skin, and emotions can create a mandala-like positive effect on every other realm of your life. Who would have thought it? Igniting the power of your digestion may be the best way to have more fulfilling orgasms.

~Katie

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Meditation for Building and Healing Sexual Energy

You can do this meditation sitting down, but I find it helpful to lie down with some support under my spine, such as a folded blanket or a bolster. Try working with this practice for at least 40 days, for 15-45 minutes daily.

Close your eyes and let your body relax and settle into its connection to the earth. Feel that you are in a nurturing, soothing place, and that you are fully safe to relax and let go. Notice, for a few minutes, the simple miracle of the breath. The inhale raises the navel center away from you, without you trying, and lowers the belly back onto you as you breathe out. Again, try not to try. Simply watch the belly as you become more and more relaxed.

Now, begin to smooth and even out the inhale and exhale. Take a few minutes to get the inhale and exhale as smooth and even as possible. The more relaxed you become, the subtler the breath becomes. Now, begin to remember love. Remember a time when you felt totally in love, totally safe, and totally nurtured. Take a few minutes to be in this memory of sweet love.

Slowly begin to become aware of where you feel love in your body. What is it like? Is it open or closed? Is it warm or cold? Expanded or contracted? Why does it feel good? Begin to let this love spread to your entire being. Rest for a moment in the love. Anytime you feel yourself coming into self-judgment, come back to the remembrance of love. Tell yourself, “My darling, you are seen; you are loved.” Talk to you inner being like a little girl. Tell her everything is going to be okay. (We do this “little girl” talk because many of our holding patterns are stored from child and girlhood.)

Begin to bring your attention into the space around your tailbone area, all the way around to your pubis and up to the space just below the navel. Blow your awareness up like a balloon at

this area. Breathe in and feel your inhale inhabit your pelvic floor. Breathe out. Breathe in and feel your inhale inhabit your lower back. Breathe out. Breathe in and feel your inhale inhabit your right hipbone. Breathe out. Breathe in and feel your inhale inhabit your left hipbone. Breathe out. Now, breathe in and feel your inhale inhabit your entire pelvic bowl (sense this pelvic area that sits low and deep under your belly), the sacred sacrum, the holy place. Take a few minutes to let your awareness swirl around as love and energy in your sacred bowl. Search out any areas that may feel blocked.

When you find these spots, you can see them as blockages sitting on the vast creative capacity you hold in this area of the body, the seat of all rejuvenation and creation. It also sits on the sweet pleasure that your pelvic bowl holds for you. Let your awareness stay in these spots, and keep breathing love, allowing your attention and focus to penetrate the dark corners of your feminine heart. Remember, energy follows focus. The more you can soften into love and send your focus to the stickiness, the greater the chance that the blockage can dissolve and resolve itself. Keep moving your awareness through the visualization and allowing the energy to open and disperse any blocks in your womb.

Finally, there may come a moment when the womb area is just so full of light and openness that you can abandon the technique and simply enjoy breathing into the new space you have created there. Now would be a good time to begin to chant a mantra into the energetic womb connection you have created. The mantra som (pronounced sohm) is an excellent healing tonic for this area.

To come out of the meditation, simply deepen your breath, offering gratitude for the practice. Slowly begin to move your body and come back.

~Katie

*This is drawn from the Sexy section of Healthy, Happy, Sexy. For more healthy, happy goodness to keep on your kitchen counter and nightstand, you can order your own copy here.

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People and Their Deepest Darkest Secrets

I get the honor of meeting with people in private sessions where they reveal to me their deepest, darkest secrets. Here is what most people are so afraid to admit. Its also what ALOT OF US SHARE. Ready?
  1. People want to be having better sex and more intimacy with their significant other.
  2. People feel fat.
  3. People feel totally unworthy of their dreams.
  4. People do one or more things “too much.” They eat too much sugar, drink too much wine, smoke pot, and the most shameful one – they eat for comfort. The crazy part? They know it.
  5. People don’t do one or more things that they really want to be doing. For some reason they gave up yoga, meditation, painting, writing, or singing. And the soul weeps for their lost muse.
You see, sometimes we KNOW what we should do, and we don’t do it. And we know what we SHOULDN’T do and we do do it. You still with me? Tantra says this about our weird inner battle – there is no good and no bad. You shouldn’t do or not do anything. It’s all about what is useful and loving at any given point in time. Breathe. A Sigh. Of Relief.
But it’s still not an excuse to go catatonic in the Lazy-Boy watching The Bachelorette. Tantra also says that until we feel that we are living our purpose, we are gonna’ suffer. That purpose is both service to the world, as well as spiritual liberation (with a side of just straight-up pleasure).
~Katie
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How Real Deal Christians Schooled This Yogini on Love and Forgiveness

Yoga-mat-carrying-chics could learn something from bible-carrying chics. I should know. I got schooled by some sassy, suit-wearing lady-preachers this past year when I moved back down south to Virginia, land of the notorious Bible Belt.

A few months back I had a big ole’ fat case of the poor-me’s. A mind gremlin had actually wrapped her slimy webbed palms around my head and heart. She was ruthless, loudly blaring things into my heart space that made me wanna’ give up on my dreams and get in bed with a box of Chex-mix and a block of cheese.

Luckily, my mama (Vera) was around to pull me out of funk-city, dragging me kicking and screaming to a bible study. The last time I had been to bible class I was wearing MC-hammer pants, braiding friendship bracelets and listing to Toni Braxton. Needless to say, I was less than thrilled at the prospect of revisiting that awkward time of my embodiment.

“I demand it,” she said. “You are coming with me to my ‘little’ bible study.”

My mom always calls it her “little” bible study. Its as if by adding a diminutive qualifier to the whole charade she can somehow fool all the other non-Christians into overlooking what clearly proved to be a Jesusy-Tantrik, Christ-Worshipin’, Lady-Witch gathering, complete with scented oils, speaking in tongues and the laying of hands.

Little, my ass. There is nothing little about my mamas bible study. Not only are most of the women buxom and juicy, but the unapologetic spiritual dexterity and prayer-filled dedication of these Jesus-loving ladies made me wonder if we yogini gals had a few things to learn from them.

Let me explain….

About half-way through the study’s lesson on faith and surrender, it became obvious to the group that I wasn’t sharing much (an oddity for me in any lady-group circle, let me assure you). With much trepidation, I admitted to the group of women that I didn’t feel comfortable sharing and connecting with them because I could feel myself holding so much pain and anger against the Christian church.

“What are you angry about,” said the leader-lady, a no-nonsense woman with a loving matriarchal tone.

“Well, Im angry that a bunch of middle aged southern men made me feel so bad for being a sexual, sensual creature. Im angry that at the age of 13 I had to sign a “promise” stating that I would never have sex before marriage. I am angry that I was subjected to lock-ins at the age 14 where me and my Jewish friends were shown graphic low-fi videos depicting non-Christians’ eventual resting place – the fiery lakes of Satan’s, teeth-gnashing hot wonderland. I was angry that I was stuffed full of Krispee Creme donuts and Mr. Pibb throughout the night, and at a hazy, sugar-drugged 3 AM, asked whether or not I wanted to be a child of God or not. I was so angry, and even sadder, that the single most intimate aspects of myself –  my body, my sexuality and my connection to the Divine Creator of the Universe was co-opted by a patriarchal religious system that was so afraid of my vagina that they wanted to keep it on lock-down through prepubescent pseudo-contracts and fattening me up with donut creme".

As I finished my tear-stained rant, the preacher-woman stood up and came over by my side. She put her hands on my head and I closed my eyes as she entered into some sort of Christ-loving lady-trance.

“Lord,” she proclaimed, “Free Katie from this burden she is carrying, oh Divine One. Lord, may all the thoughts inside Katie that were placed into her by these men in bad suits and bad hair cuts, be removed from her right here and right now. We know Lord, that she is your sacred jewel, your most beloved possession. Lord, we know that she was created by you, in perfection. May all these thoughts and feelings she has inside of her that tell her she is damaged, that she is dirty, that she is shamed, be removed from her right here and right now, Oh Lord. This child of God is a light for your love. This is how you see her, Oh Lord, and let her see herself in this way from here on out.”

As she continued praying and laying hands over me, I felt the store house of years of 13-year old-girl-sadness and angst leave my body. I felt relief, knowing that there was a group of people that embodied Christ’s nonjudgmental love and acceptance. With my eyes closed, I saw my whole body fill up with light, tears streaming down my face, as I let this woman of God midwife the exorcism of the thought-forms that the southern Baptist charade had mistakenly planted into my body.

Slowly, each of the ten women came over and put their hands on me. I felt safe, knowing that these women loved me for exactly who I was as they cried out Amen and whispered “Yes, Jesus.” I felt healed. I was being healed by the MAMAS of the Christian realms. I felt the whole wily band of Christ’s cheerleaders placing their loving mama-hands on the wounds that had wrapped themselves on my heart like tentacles.

But Jesus wasn’t done with me yet…

The leader-mama actually got down under the tall table, on hands and knees, in her sleek black lady-suit, and anointed my feet with oil, just like in old-school Bible times. She freaking anointed me with oil. She was fearless. She put it on my feet, praying that I may be protected wherever I walked.

She put it on my hands, saying that my hands would act as servants of love in the world. She put it on my forehead, saying that my mind would be a clear vessel for Christ. Finally she looked up at me and said, “Now Katie, do you FORGIVE them? Do you forgive those men in suits? Do you forgive the church?”

Oh hot damn. She was asking ME to be the forgiving one. Not the men in the suits or the church, but ME. She was asking me to do what Jesus Christ would have done. She was skilled at her craft and I was ready. “Yes,” I whispered.  And I did forgive. And forgiveness washed through me like a cool river. Like love.

These women, acting on behalf of the love of Christ, saved me. 

I got saved – saved for the second time. Not like the first time, out of fear-coercion and childish innocence, but saved out of love and forgiveness.  I was saved from the memories that lived in me of how bad Christianity had been to me. I was saved from all the anger that I was carrying around. I was saved from myself and my own limited view of what it means to be on the real-deal spiritual path. I was saved from that limited sense of self that told me that I knew what I needed. I got saved.

My Christianity may never look like my parents’ version, the Church’s version, or even that wild group of Christian lady-witches’ version. But what I do know is that I am a Guardian of Love, chosen by Christ to continue to forgive and love, forgive and love, forgive and love. Thats how Jesus is alive in me.

And that was how my mama’s ‘little’ bible study went down.

To conclude, here is what I learned from real-deal Christian mamas:

i. They aren’t impressed with the political and economic use of Christianity – they are impressed by acts of great trust and love.

ii. Lots of cool Christian women (and men I assume) are NOT happy with the way things have been going down in the Christian church. That real-deal preacher woman told me that oftentimes it is the very leaders of religion that are closest to “the devil” himself. I knew that, but to have a preacher woman SAY it. Word.

iii. Prayer is something Christians go to – like everyday – to help support one another and themselves. These ladies are praying for each other ON THE DAILY. When was the last time you sat your hot yoga-toned bootie down and PRAYED for your friends? Maybe we could start being fearless enough to do that for ourselves and selfless enough to do it for one another.

iv. Circles are good for study. These women get together weekly to deeply study their sacred text – the Bible. When was the last time you got together with your yoga mates to dig deep into the Sutras or Rumi or a rad Tantric text? We can learn so much from these mamas. Gather in circles. Talk to one another. Not in your “yoga voice,” but in your most vulnerable, real-deal voice. You know, the voice that your friends from high school would recognize as you. Bring the spiritual book of your choice, it doesn’t matter. The bible says that when 2 or more are gathered in “my name,” Love appears.

v. Real-deal Christians are doing the same thing that real-deal yogis or Buddhists or Hindus or Jews are doing. Call yourself whatever you want – the end game is the same for all of us. Its love. L-O-V-E, love.

What lessons have you learned from unlikely places that change how you practice yoga – on the mat, and in life?

~Katie

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Ayurveda Can Change Your Life – Ten Things You May Not Know About Yoga’s Sister

The yoga world has a lesser-known sister and her name is Ayurveda. For thousands of years, yoga and Ayurveda were seen as necessary compliments to one another. But somewhere along the way, we fell in love with yoga and yet forgot about Ayurveda.

And although some famous mamas like Madonna, Christy Turlington, and the Grand Priestess of Get-Your-Act-Together (Oprah) have touted its health-boosting benefits, Ayurveda remains largely an exotic Indian mystery.

I heard about Ayurveda in India. I was studying with a sweet old Brahmin man named A.G. Mohan. I remember thinking, wow, this is amazing and its never gonna’ be applicable to my life back in the U.S. But the more I studied it, the more I realized that it was all about developing deep self-awareness. It was also about humbling the ego (that tells you that you really deserve an entire bar of dark chocolate) to the laws of Nature.

I feel like its time for yoga’s powerhouse sister to come out of hiding and begin infusing our practices and lives with rich, time-tested wisdom.  I wanna’ help her, so here is my mini-Ayurveda primer, just for you.

Ayurveda – which means “Science of Life,” holds the following premises as true:

1.  If Ayurveda were a religion (it’s not), Nature is God and the only sin is not listening to your higher-knowing.

2.  Nature has cycles – daily and seasonal. When we learn them, we can ride them and glean some of their power. When we ignore them, we suffer. When we tune to natural rhythms, our body becomes more balanced naturally. (e.g. being in bed asleep by 10 p.m. instead of surfing Amazon is one example of tuning to natural rhythm).

3.  The body is a wise, Spirit-infused, breathing-animal, mind-matrix charged with an electro-intelligence called prana (energy).  When prana is flowing where it should, you GLOW. Plain and simple.

4.  You are a unique, special snowflake, just like everybody else. Because each individual is unique, you will have different needs. This holds true whether we are talking about what you eat, how many times a month you have sex, or how often and what you do for exercise.

5.  Disease can be caused by a number of things – but at its core, disease is caused by forgetting who we are  – A Timeless Spirit Being.

6.  There is one answer to any question in Ayurveda: It depends.

7.  Energy follows focus. Our experience of life, how we see the world “out there,” and whether we are happy or not, is largely determined by our energy. When we change our energy, our thoughts change. When we change our thoughts, energy shifts in that direction.

8.  Oil your machine – don’t wait for your body to start creaking and cracking before you oil it! Like any fine-tuned instrument, the body needs to be oiled. So go slap some coconut oil on your fine thighs. Now.

9.  Many people are fatigued and depressed/anxious because they aren’t living the life they want to live.

10.  You can’t stop constipation by eating more raw cauliflower. Okay, this one is a stretch, but raw food, if you are already constipated, ain’t gonna help. Ayurveda understands that anything can turn to poison in the body if your metabolism can’t digest it. Yes, even raw organic goji-berry-acai-kale smoothies. Lay off the cold beverages, cold sandwiches, carrots, raw nuts and raw veggies if you suffer from anxiety, insomnia or constipation. Drink some warm ginger tea, eat some soup and rub your body in oil.

I hope this list will get you started on at least becoming curious about what this philosophy and science has to offer your life.

Share it! Live it!

~Katie

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How to Fall in Love Yogi Style

If you have ever been in love, you know that there is an incredible amount of power, or shakti, behind falling into the wild rapture of delighting in someone else. There is so much power in the experience of love, in fact, that we have created a whole culture and consumer landscape around trying to get more of it.

Yogis understand that where there is power, there is potential fertile ground for connecting deeper into our heart and soul. But the object of love was way less important than the act of loving itself. Yogis fall in love by realizing that what they love, and the part of themselves that is able to love, is actually the same thing.

A yogi also uses the remembrance of love to connect to the release of bliss-bombs in their own heart. Now, this may sound very “dolphins and rainbows,” but science supports the bliss-bomb theory. When we are in love (or feel deeply understood, or cuddle a kitty, or get a massage), there is an increase of the hormone oxytocin in our system. This blissful hormone has been shown to be the polar opposite of our stress hormones, allowing us to feel relaxed, safe, trusting and generous. Studies show that people with high amounts of oxytocin experience less loneliness and physical pain. They were also shown to be better communicators, and to feel more connected to their work and the people around them.

We can learn from the yogic philosophy of love. We don’t necessarily need an external event, or lover, to catalyze our own waterfall of juicy oxytocin and emotional fulfillment. We can use some simple yogic practices to fall in love from within. And the best part? When we fall in love from within, we may actually attract more love from the outside—teddy-bear-shaped hearts and all.

Four Tips on Getting More Yogi Love

1. The power of loving what already is. Take pause to appreciate what surrounds you in the moment. Gain pleasure from what already is, without grasping for what could be. Ask yourself, “What is it about this moment (or this room, person, place) that is absolutely worthy of my love and appreciation?” Feel that love fill you up as you express contentment with exactly what you already have.

2. The power of loving touch. Yoga teaches us how to soften ourselves enough to be touched by life. On a physical level, any kind of appropriate touching has been shown to increase oxytocin and reduce stress hormones in the body. Whether it be a gentle massage, a warm hug, or the intimate touch of a lover, fill your life up with opportunities for skin-rubbing sweetness. If you live with love ones, try giving more touch. If you live alone, surround yourself with friends who don’t mind doling out the tender embraces.

3. The power of loving selflessly. My teacher, Rod Stryker, encourages us to meditate on “love without ownership.” This is a beautiful practice for cultivating non-attachment around the people and things we already have in our lives. The yogis knew that we could love better, and more authentically, when we loved people without trying to own or change them. Practice daily acts of selfless love with no expectation for returns on investment. My fellow yogini, Rachel Meyer, used to make a love-filled cake every Saturday and give it to someone who may have had a hard week. Do you knowanyone who may need an unexpected and heartfelt treat?

4. The power of loving remembrance. There is a powerful Tantric practice for increasing the feeling of love in your life. Begin by allowing yourself to close your eyes and settle into your breath. As you become more and more relaxed, allow yourself to remember a time in your life when you felt very deeply and utterly “in love.” It may have been through the experience of a lover’s embrace, receiving a drawing from your child, or a sunset in your backyard that called your heart to open. Remember this, and feel the remembrance of the love in the body. Then, leave the memory behind and pay close attention to the feeling sensations of the “being in” love. Watch how it grows and expands on its own as you experience the delight of objectless love.

~Katie

This article was originally published in the Yoga Journal Blog on February 10, 2012.

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