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Sex

The Pelvic Floor & Pleasure

The Pelvic Floor & Pleasure

The pelvic floor was designed not to be a muscle you train, but rather a muscle that moves fluidly in connection with the muscles in your lower limbs and trunk of your body. The combination of these muscles working together in a feminine flow is what results in a healthy pelvic floor. Contrary to popular belief, repetitively engaging in kegel exercises (exercises that train the pelvis to contract) is not a balanced approach for strengthening the pelvic bowl, unless you are using them for postpartum recovery or targeting a certain injury or imbalance. Don’t get me wrong, kegel exercises do have their place in women’s health. Kegels and other tightening exercises (like using a jade egg: See p. 198 of Happy, Healthy, Sexy) can be extremely beneficial to mother’s after giving birth or any woman working to retrain, retone, and re-tighten the vaginal walls. Outside of that, when we exclusively focus on contracting the pelvic floor we become vulnerable to many health imbalances including chronic stress, bloating, hormonal issues, and possibly pelvic floor disorder. When our pelvic floor muscles are too tight it can dull our sensitivity to arousal and sexual pleasure. For a flower to open, it must surrender it’s petals. It all comes back to balance.

Did you know that there is a direct line of fascia linking your jaw to your pelvis?

The connection and bio-mechanical relationship that your jaw and pelvis have is particularly helpful for women to understand. It's especially relevant for women with pelvic floor pain. A study in the Journal of Manipulative and Physiological Therapeutics from Hanover Medical School in Germany revealed that TMJ (aka temporo-mandibular joint dysfunction) plays an important role in hip mobility restriction experienced by patients with pain. This indicated a connectedness between these two intrinsic parts of the body.

If you've been stuck in a pattern of clenching the pelvis it may be difficult to even know where to begin when it comes to relaxing those muscles. Going to the jawline can be a more accessible place to start and will seem to magically open the pelvic bowl. Ina May Gaskin, a female healer and wise leader in midwifery, even coined the term “the sphincter law” to explain that if the jaw and throat are relaxed then the buttocks and pelvis will be too. She says, “The state of relaxation of the mouth and jaw is directly correlated to the ability of the cervix, the vagina, and the anus to open to full capacity.” (Gaskin, 2003, p. 170) On the flip side, if you are clenching your jaw often, you’re probably also clenching your pelvis.

How do I know if my pelvis is contracted?

If you exercise frequently, do yoga, stress easily, or wear heels above 1/8th of an inch, your pelvis is probably contracted. In the modern day yoga and fitness world many women are cued to “contract the navel, lift your belly in and up, draw your navel in and pull your tailbone down,” and while these cues may have there place for certain exercises, if you aren’t spending adequate time intentionally doing the opposite and relaxing you are cuing your body to stay in a hyperarousal state. When we wear heels it causes an anterior pelvic tilt.

These incredible bodies we live in were made to keep each body part in balance with the other. If one body part becomes fixed, the whole system has to compensate. This can lead to a chain reaction of imbalance causing our abdominal organs to be squashed and our belly to bloat.

Many of us have lost our sensitivity to even feel this hyper-flexed state because we've become somewhat disconnected from our bodies. By engaging in more fluid, less structured movement, and through time spent softening, surrendering, and relaxing the pelvic floor those muscles will actually become stronger! Just like the rest of the body, when you overtax a certain muscle, you need adequate rest and recovery time in order for that muscle to actually grow and remain healthy.

How can we maintain an overall healthy pelvic floor?

Diversify your movements! Don’t just focus on one exercise. Doing kegels is similar to doing a bicep curl for your pelvis. You’re only going to strengthen one muscle. Try engaging in a wide range of fluid motions. Movements involving squatting, lunging, and lengthening of the limbs will help tone the pelvis while also help to strengthen the extremities which will create ease on the pelvis while also gaining strength and longevity.

Exercises to tone, relax, & strengthen the pelvis:

  • Breathing practices with elongated exhales
  • Long walks in shoes without heels
  • Take pause throughout the day to relax the jaw
  • Lay down with some massage balls!
  • Get or give yourself a face massage
  • Chakravakasana (cat cow) with lion’s breath to loosen the hips and the jaw
  • Anytime you are doing tightening or strengthening exercises make sure to take adequate recovery time and focus on relaxing the jaw & the pelvic bowl
  • Our Foam roller and pelvic release classes in the Shakti School Membership Community:
Pelvic Power Bowl
March2019
May2019

Login here to view these classes or sign up for one month free using the discount code FREETRIAL at checkout.

How will having a more relaxed & toned pelvis lead to experiencing more pleasure?

When the pelvic floor muscles are chronically tensed the muscles will eventually become less flexible. When the muscles are unable to move and stretch, sensations will become weakened and the ability to engage with that area emotionally will also become more difficult.

In Happy Healthy Sexy: Ayurveda Wisdom for Modern Women, I wrote: “Pleasure-power has everything to do with cultivating our ability to feel and experience pleasure in daily life-- in and out of the bedroom. It’s about getting quiet and content enough to experience the immense beauty that is always present when our senses are tuned in.” Similarly, when we educate ourselves on the pelvic floor it is essential for us to focus on being in continuous engagement with our bodies. The key element to building strength, fluidity, and our ability to experience pleasure is to return to movements that are less rigid, more balanced, and more fluid. It is there where we will find more ease with the body, mind, and spirit.

Our Favorite Products for Pelvic Floor Health

Foria Awaken Arousel Fluid and Personal Lubricant

We LOVE this product. It's main ingredients are Hemp (a source of CBD!) and Kava. It helps relax the pelvic floor and increase blood circulation to nourish your tissues and increase your capacity for pleasure. Get 10% off your order with the promocode SHAKTILOVE.

Jade Eggs Set

Banyan’s Coconut Brahmi Oil

Use promocode KATIES15 for 15% off your order with Banyan.

Foods that are good for your connective tissue:

  • Bone Broth
  • Ghee
  • Collagen
  • Tocos (Plant collagen-like supplement) Receive 15% with code SHAKTISUN
  • Magnesium
  • Spring Water
  • Chia Seeds
  • Golden Milk
  • Women's Blend Tea

References

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19539119

https://www.nutritiousmovement.com/kegel-queen/

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4573594/

https://www.alignpt.com/mysterious-connection-pelvis-jaw/

https://www.christinemathesonnd.com/blog/pelvic-health-jaw-tension-connection

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In October, the air becomes cooler, drier and more In October, the air becomes cooler, drier and more mobile. You may begin to notice more anxious thoughts, dry skin, irregular digestion, disrupted sleep or feeling ungrounded in your body. We can balance these vata qualities with moisture, nourishing foods and grounding rhythms for our nervous systems. ⁠
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Some of my favorite October foods:⁠
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• Butternut squash, acorn squash and pumpkin are sweet, grounding and deeply nourishing for dry autumn tissues⁠
• Ginger kindles agni, supports circulation and helps keep digestion strong as temperatures drop⁠
• Mung beans are one of Ayurveda’s most digestible legumes, bringing nourishment without heaviness⁠
• Garlic offers warmth and stimulation, helping counter sluggish digestion and coldness⁠
• Cardamom gently supports digestion while bringing warmth without excessive heat⁠
• Oatmeal is heavy, soft and grounding, making it one of autumn’s most supportive breakfasts⁠
• Warm spiced milk nourishes ojas, supports the nervous system and invites deeper rest⁠
• Black pepper awakens digestion and helps the body absorb nutrients more efficiently⁠
• Cinnamon is warming, circulatory and especially supportive during cold, windy seasons⁠
• Cloves bring heat and stimulation while supporting digestion and respiratory wellness⁠
• Turmeric supports healthy inflammation response and keeps digestion moving well⁠
• Sweet potatoes are sweet, earthy and stabilizing for an overstimulated nervous system⁠
• Warming stews provide moisture, softness and sustained nourishment as vata rises⁠
• Soaked or sprouted nuts and seeds offer healthy fats and density, helping combat seasonal dryness⁠
• Root vegetables literally grow beneath the earth, carrying grounding qualities that help us feel more rooted too⁠
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P.S. If you’re in the Southern Hemisphere, you’re moving further into spring and rising pitta, so your body may be asking for lighter and more cooling support right now. 💦⁠
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Early bird enrollment for our 2027 Ayurvedic Wellness Coach Certification closes THIS MONTH. ⁠
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☎️ Comment AYURVEDASCHOOL to learn more or book a complimentary call with our team!
Just a little love note from me as I am finally ba Just a little love note from me as I am finally back in my new/old home from the house fire. And public service announcement: if you are looking for a beautiful spiritual home, we only have three weeks left on our early bird pricing. We start very very soon! DM me if you are considering it or comment AYURVEDASCHOOL to learn more!
One of the biggest questions I get from women expl One of the biggest questions I get from women exploring our program is “What can I actually do with an Ayurvedic coaching certification? What’s the scope of a coaching practice?”⁠
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Becoming a certified coach is absolutely a viable career path, and it can also enhance the offerings that you already have. 🌿⁠
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With an Ayurvedic Wellness Coach certification, you can legally and ethically work with people as a coach and educator in so many ways, including:⁠
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📒 Working 1:1 as a wellness or lifestyle coach, helping clients with digestion, stress, hormones, energy, daily rhythms and self-care (within the coaching scope and with proper insurance)⁠
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🧘🏽‍♀️ Teaching workshops in yoga studios, community spaces, retreat centers or online⁠
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🌬️ Guiding people through nutrition education, daily routines, seasonal resets, meditation and nervous system support⁠
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🥀 Supporting women with cycle awareness, womb wellness and feminine rhythm education⁠
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🗓️ Creating group programs, circles or educational offerings rooted in preventative care and self-healing⁠
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💗 Using Ayurveda first and foremost for your own life, and letting your lived experience become your medicine⁠
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Working as an Ayurvedic Wellness Coach is about teaching people how to live well, how to listen to their bodies and how to create daily practices that actually work in real life.⁠
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And yes, when you go through our program you’ll also leave with real tools: a gorgeous training manual, client forms, starter business resources and a community of women walking this path with you.⁠
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We’d love to welcome you into our school. Early Bird pricing ends this month, so now is the time to get in and save $500 off tuition!⁠
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✨ If you’re ready to dive in right now and start learning divine feminine Ayurveda, comment WISDOM and we’ll send you our free Women’s Wisdom + Ayurveda course.⁠
So often we’re encouraged to quiet our emotions, So often we’re encouraged to quiet our emotions, cool our passion or see the more expressive parts of ourselves as something to manage or overcome.⁠
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But what if those very parts of us are some of the most sacred ones?⁠
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Your emotions. Your desires. Your body. Your passion.⁠
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These things are not obstacles to transcend. They are doorways back to yourself.⁠
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Anything in your life can become a spiritual tool if it brings you closer to your deepest truth. And YOU get to decide what that guiding truth is.⁠
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🌹 Want to begin reconnecting with your own inner wisdom? Get our free Women’s Wisdom Mini Course and learn how to listen to your heart’s desires, trust your intuition and reconnect with the wisdom that has always been within you. Comment WISDOM and we’ll send you the details.⁠
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✨ This is the final month to join Early Bird registration for our 2027 Level 1 Ayurvedic Wellness Coach Certification Training. Comment AYURVEDASCHOOL to learn more or book a free call with one of our graduates.⁠
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Original meme by @arturrioni
Do you have questions about The Shakti School and Do you have questions about The Shakti School and what it would actually look like to fit the program into your life? Maybe you’re wondering how much time you should realistically set aside each week, how the coursework fits around a busy schedule, whether you can make the financial investment work, or what the experience is really like once you’re inside.

Maybe you’re excited about the school, but there are still a few practical pieces you want to understand before making a decision. That’s exactly what our clarity calls are here for. 🤍

These calls are completely free, totally pressure-free, and designed to give you space to ask all the questions you have. You’ll get to talk with a REAL human, learn more about the Feminine-Form Ayurveda School, and get a clearer sense of whether it feels like the right fit for you and your life. ✨

Nikkie Nie is one of our beloved coaches you can chat with! Nikki is a 500 Hour Registered Tantric Hatha Yoga and Meditation teacher, Ayurvedic Wellness Coach and Reiki + Sound Practitioner and masterfully facilitates spaces for people to empower their energy and ultimately their life!

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