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Sex

The Pelvic Floor & Pleasure

The Pelvic Floor & Pleasure

The pelvic floor was designed not to be a muscle you train, but rather a muscle that moves fluidly in connection with the muscles in your lower limbs and trunk of your body. The combination of these muscles working together in a feminine flow is what results in a healthy pelvic floor. Contrary to popular belief, repetitively engaging in kegel exercises (exercises that train the pelvis to contract) is not a balanced approach for strengthening the pelvic bowl, unless you are using them for postpartum recovery or targeting a certain injury or imbalance. Don’t get me wrong, kegel exercises do have their place in women’s health. Kegels and other tightening exercises (like using a jade egg: See p. 198 of Happy, Healthy, Sexy) can be extremely beneficial to mother’s after giving birth or any woman working to retrain, retone, and re-tighten the vaginal walls. Outside of that, when we exclusively focus on contracting the pelvic floor we become vulnerable to many health imbalances including chronic stress, bloating, hormonal issues, and possibly pelvic floor disorder. When our pelvic floor muscles are too tight it can dull our sensitivity to arousal and sexual pleasure. For a flower to open, it must surrender it’s petals. It all comes back to balance.

Did you know that there is a direct line of fascia linking your jaw to your pelvis?

The connection and bio-mechanical relationship that your jaw and pelvis have is particularly helpful for women to understand. It's especially relevant for women with pelvic floor pain. A study in the Journal of Manipulative and Physiological Therapeutics from Hanover Medical School in Germany revealed that TMJ (aka temporo-mandibular joint dysfunction) plays an important role in hip mobility restriction experienced by patients with pain. This indicated a connectedness between these two intrinsic parts of the body.

If you've been stuck in a pattern of clenching the pelvis it may be difficult to even know where to begin when it comes to relaxing those muscles. Going to the jawline can be a more accessible place to start and will seem to magically open the pelvic bowl. Ina May Gaskin, a female healer and wise leader in midwifery, even coined the term “the sphincter law” to explain that if the jaw and throat are relaxed then the buttocks and pelvis will be too. She says, “The state of relaxation of the mouth and jaw is directly correlated to the ability of the cervix, the vagina, and the anus to open to full capacity.” (Gaskin, 2003, p. 170) On the flip side, if you are clenching your jaw often, you’re probably also clenching your pelvis.

How do I know if my pelvis is contracted?

If you exercise frequently, do yoga, stress easily, or wear heels above 1/8th of an inch, your pelvis is probably contracted. In the modern day yoga and fitness world many women are cued to “contract the navel, lift your belly in and up, draw your navel in and pull your tailbone down,” and while these cues may have there place for certain exercises, if you aren’t spending adequate time intentionally doing the opposite and relaxing you are cuing your body to stay in a hyperarousal state. When we wear heels it causes an anterior pelvic tilt.

These incredible bodies we live in were made to keep each body part in balance with the other. If one body part becomes fixed, the whole system has to compensate. This can lead to a chain reaction of imbalance causing our abdominal organs to be squashed and our belly to bloat.

Many of us have lost our sensitivity to even feel this hyper-flexed state because we've become somewhat disconnected from our bodies. By engaging in more fluid, less structured movement, and through time spent softening, surrendering, and relaxing the pelvic floor those muscles will actually become stronger! Just like the rest of the body, when you overtax a certain muscle, you need adequate rest and recovery time in order for that muscle to actually grow and remain healthy.

How can we maintain an overall healthy pelvic floor?

Diversify your movements! Don’t just focus on one exercise. Doing kegels is similar to doing a bicep curl for your pelvis. You’re only going to strengthen one muscle. Try engaging in a wide range of fluid motions. Movements involving squatting, lunging, and lengthening of the limbs will help tone the pelvis while also help to strengthen the extremities which will create ease on the pelvis while also gaining strength and longevity.

Exercises to tone, relax, & strengthen the pelvis:

  • Breathing practices with elongated exhales
  • Long walks in shoes without heels
  • Take pause throughout the day to relax the jaw
  • Lay down with some massage balls!
  • Get or give yourself a face massage
  • Chakravakasana (cat cow) with lion’s breath to loosen the hips and the jaw
  • Anytime you are doing tightening or strengthening exercises make sure to take adequate recovery time and focus on relaxing the jaw & the pelvic bowl
  • Our Foam roller and pelvic release classes in the Shakti School Membership Community:
Pelvic Power Bowl
March2019
May2019

Login here to view these classes or sign up for one month free using the discount code FREETRIAL at checkout.

How will having a more relaxed & toned pelvis lead to experiencing more pleasure?

When the pelvic floor muscles are chronically tensed the muscles will eventually become less flexible. When the muscles are unable to move and stretch, sensations will become weakened and the ability to engage with that area emotionally will also become more difficult.

In Happy Healthy Sexy: Ayurveda Wisdom for Modern Women, I wrote: “Pleasure-power has everything to do with cultivating our ability to feel and experience pleasure in daily life-- in and out of the bedroom. It’s about getting quiet and content enough to experience the immense beauty that is always present when our senses are tuned in.” Similarly, when we educate ourselves on the pelvic floor it is essential for us to focus on being in continuous engagement with our bodies. The key element to building strength, fluidity, and our ability to experience pleasure is to return to movements that are less rigid, more balanced, and more fluid. It is there where we will find more ease with the body, mind, and spirit.

Our Favorite Products for Pelvic Floor Health

Foria Awaken Arousel Fluid and Personal Lubricant

We LOVE this product. It's main ingredients are Hemp (a source of CBD!) and Kava. It helps relax the pelvic floor and increase blood circulation to nourish your tissues and increase your capacity for pleasure. Get 10% off your order with the promocode SHAKTILOVE.

Jade Eggs Set

Banyan’s Coconut Brahmi Oil

Use promocode SHAKTI10 for 10% off your order with Banyan.

Foods that are good for your connective tissue:

  • Bone Broth
  • Ghee
  • Collagen
  • Tocos (Plant collagen-like supplement) Receive 15% with code SHAKTISUN
  • Magnesium
  • Spring Water
  • Chia Seeds
  • Golden Milk
  • Women's Blend Tea

References

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19539119

https://www.nutritiousmovement.com/kegel-queen/

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4573594/

https://www.alignpt.com/mysterious-connection-pelvis-jaw/

https://www.christinemathesonnd.com/blog/pelvic-health-jaw-tension-connection

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Meet core Shakti School faculty Sandhiya Ramaswamy Meet core Shakti School faculty Sandhiya Ramaswamy, Clinical Ayurvedic Specialist, educator, chef and retreat leader. Sandhiya is one of the beloved teachers guiding our Level 2 Ayurvedic Health Counselor Online Certification that begins April 21st. 🌿 ⁠
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For nearly a decade, through her practice Alchemy Ayurveda in Dana Point, CA, Sandhiya has helped hundreds of clients and students experience Ayurveda as a true lived wisdom through consultations, workshops, cooking classes and retreats.⁠
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In Level 2, Sandhiya deepens the classical roots of the tradition while making the teachings profoundly practical. Students study essential Ayurvedic theory including Strotamsi (the living pathways of the body) and Samprapti & Vyadhi Marga (the disease process), building the clinical lens needed to truly understand how imbalance unfolds and how healing begins.⁠
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Her fan-favorite class, Cooking with Spices as Medicine, brings Ayurveda straight into your kitchen. Here, food is honored as the first medicine, the kitchen becomes the pharmacy and the spice cabinet your daily apothecary. 🫚💫⁠
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Through hands-on tutorials and ancestral wisdom, you’ll learn how everyday spices awaken digestion, support microcirculation, build ojas and prevent imbalance - using simple “micro doses” you can apply immediately in real life.⁠
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🙏🏼 If your heart is ready to deepen your studies and become an embodied channel for the living wisdom of Ayurveda, we would love to welcome you. ✨⁠
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💚 Level 2 begins April 21, 2026. Reach out with any questions. We’re here to support you.⁠
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The first month of your Ayurveda awakening be like The first month of your Ayurveda awakening be like… hello, bank account. 🌿🍯🛒

Suddenly your online cart is full of ghee, herbs and jars of ancient goodness and next thing you know you’re feeding your boo a steady diet of mysterious tonics and herbs every 5 hours. 

The Ayurveda glow-up is priceless though - for you AND your family! ✨🌿 If you know you know. 😉

Inspired by @standwellness meme 🔥
Love really is a frequency, and it extends far bey Love really is a frequency, and it extends far beyond the romantic cliches. 💗 One of the most sacred forms of love is the love between friends.⁠
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We felt the love big time in this beautiful Galentine’s giveaway with Herbal Face Food.⁠
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Our two BFF winners, Ashton Miller + Alexa Frear reminded us what this month of love is really about: ⁠
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“My name is Ashton Miller and my best gal pal is Alexa Frear. We met on a work trip and there was something about her soul that drew me in. She’s truly my soul sister! ” ❤️⁠
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Late winter in the Northern Hemisphere is a kapha- Late winter in the Northern Hemisphere is a kapha-vata crossover season - still cold, but increasingly damp and heavy as the water and earth elements begin to rise. Ayurveda teaches this is the moment to stay warm while gently stimulating circulation and clearing stagnation, so we don’t carry winter’s sluggishness into spring.⁠
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Southern Hemisphere beauties, you’re in late summer/early fall, so follow hydrating and grounding Ayurveda guidance instead of late-winter protocols (tons more on our blog for you, the link is in our bio 😉).⁠
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The sweet spot right now is warm and slightly bitter foods and gently stimulating lifestyle rhythms. Kindle agni, move your lymph and lighten up, without depleting your nervous system.⁠
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Late Winter Self-Care Checklist:⁠
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• Dress warmly even on milder days to prevent mucus and stagnation.⁠
• Get adequate sleep but avoid heavy oversleeping.⁠
• Prep for an Ayurvedic cleanse - it’s a great time to “clean out” your body, mind, home or closet!⁠
• Start dreaming up spring projects and creative plans.⁠
• Add more aerobic movement (walking, dance, fluid yoga, cycling).⁠
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• Dry brush (only if vata is balanced) and/or practice warm abhyanga.⁠
• Sip tulsi tea to support immunity and clarity.⁠
• Leafy greens, radishes, broccoli, basmati rice and well-cooked legumes are allies.⁠
• Favor warming spices like mustard seed, garlic, cinnamon, cloves and black pepper.⁠
• Fenugreek is your friend - warming, bitter and drying.⁠
• Ginger is warming and activating helping kindle agni while steadying vata.⁠
• Consider chyavanprash for deep rejuvenation.⁠
• Hydrate with warm water and keep skin plump with a gentle mist.⁠
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Ready to live in rhythm with the seasons and your cyclical nature?⁠
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This offering is for ANYONE in search of expansion, clarity and a deep connection with the Divine. With me as your guide, you’ll learn how to start a spiritual practice, or connect more deeply to the God of your own understanding through the practice you already have.⁠
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If you are ready to dive deep into your spiritual life and true healing, this is the time to join. Our next live workshop is on Thursday, March 5th from 10-12pm Eastern US Time. ⁠
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Here are some of our past workshop highlights (along with many more!)⁠
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~ The Yoga of Dreams and Psyche⁠
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~ Ayurvedic Herbs and Gardening⁠
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~ Ayurveda for the Men in Your Life⁠
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~ Yogini Bootcamp⁠
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~ The Healing Power of Sound and Touch with Dr. David Rabin⁠
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